Our Centers for Ethics:

CC! activities created by schools and youth groups

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"Taking a Stand": Scene 3

3. SKEETER'S TEST

TEACHER at her desk in Up Pit. Students enter with a lot of commotion and sit. Going from Right to Left. Alex, Down - Sandy, Up Right Center - Skeeter, Center - Gertrude Down Left Center - Nacho Left - Candy Up Left - Cory Far Left - Stacy Down Left Corner. Teacher is way too happy and excited as she takes roll. Bob walks around them sweeping.

TEACHER
Good morning class! I’m sure all of you are very excited
and ready to prove yourselves on today’s test!

She takes roll repeating “you’re here” over and over again as Skeeter talks to Alex.

SKEETER
Hey Alex, you got the answers?

ALEX
Me? Sure. Every one.

SKEETER
Show me.

ALEX
Show you. But, they’re all in my head. I
can’t show you what’s inside my head. At
least, I don’t think I can. I mean--

SKEETER
Alex, write them on a piece of paper for me.

ALEX
But, that would be like a cheat sheet.
I couldn’t do that. I’d get caught.

BOB
(talking alike a sports announcer)
Skeeter makes his second attempt to cheet!

SKEETER
Candy, got a cheat sheet?

CANDY
Get real.

SKEETER
Give me a break, will ya?

CANDY
Ask Gertrude, she’s always got them.

BOB
Roll is almost over, time running out.
Skeeter goes for the long shot!

SKEETER
Hey Gertrude.

BOB
She slowly turns, looks at him like he is
human filth, strike three! Skeeter’s out of there!

As the Teacher finishes roll Skeeter raises his hand.

BOB
But wait! Skeeter’s going for the pass!

TEACHER
Yes Skeeter?

SKEETER
I’m sick. Could I get a pass to the nurse?

TEACHER
You can go to the nurse, but if you
don’t take the test today, you’ll get a zero.

SKEETER
I feel better now.

BOB
He comes up empty, but Skeeter has a back up shot.

SKEETER
My locker was jammed. I couldn’t bring my backpack.

TEACHER
Oh well!

BOB
Another miss!

TEACHER
I want all of you to do extra
well so I’m giving everyone a minute to
look over your notes! Starting now.

SKEETER
Alex. Give me a piece of paper.

ALEX
Paper? Sure. I brought plenty of paper. Here you go.

SKEETER
(taking the paper)
Got a pen?

ALEX
Yeah. Sure.
(whips out a hand full of pens)
Take your pick.

SANDY
(passing a note to Wally)
Pass it on.

BOB
Is that a cheat sheet moving from
Sandy to Wally? Skeeter sees it.

WALLY
(opening the note, his eyes go wide as he steps to the
audience reading the note aloud)
“I think you’re cute!” I finally got a
note from a Popular Girl. She thinks I’m cute!
I have crawled my way up the social ladder, and I
have reached the pinnacle!
She thinks I’m cute! I’m getting this framed!

SANDY
Hey!
(calling to Wally,but pointing to Nacho)
That’s not for you. It’s for him.

WALLY
Oh, yeah. No problem.
(turns to Nacho)
Nacho, it’s for you.

BOB
Skeeter sees his chance.

Wally tosses the note over Skeeter to Nacho. Skeeter reaches for it, but it’s over his hand. Nacho catches it.

BOB
Ohhhhh! Skeeter’s reach comes up short!
But wait! Here comes a cheet sheet right to him!

GERTRUDE
(handing a note to Skeeter)
Pass it to Sandy.

BOB
This could be it!

NACHO
(handing note to Skeeter)
Pass it to Sandy.

SKEETER
Finally!
(he reads it aloud)
“That Dork, Alex, has a new cell phone
in her back pack.” Who cares?

Skeeter throws the note the other direction. Cory picks it up and reads it.

BOB
Another miss!
(pointing to Cory)
Little does Skeeter know, a real cheat sheet
is moving along the right side of the room.

CORY
(handing the sheet to Stacy)
Here.

Stacy opens it, looks at the audience wide eyed.

BOB
We have a shocked reaction.
Stacy has been caught totally off guard.

TEACHER
OK kids. Put everything away except
for one piece of paper and a pen.

STACY
A cheat sheet? What do I do with this?
I don’t need it. I studied all night for this
test. What if I get caught with it? Why’d
he give it to me? Should I give it back to him?

CORY
(reading the note thrown at him)
“That dork Alex has a new cell phone.”
Isn’t that interesting?

SKEETER
Hey Nacho. You got the answers to the test?

NACHO
(tapping his head)
No prob. Dude. Got ‘em all up here.

SKEETER
Yeah? Who was the first person to sign
the Declaration of Independence?

NACHO
That’s easy. Senior Cheese.

SKEETER
Where did the British surrender at the end
of the Revolutionary War?

NACHO
Nachosville. That's where my dad was born.

BOB
Skeeter makes a last ditch effort.

SKEETER
Gertrude. I’m begging you. Got a cheat sheet?

GERTRUDE
A cheat sheet? Sure, take mine.

SKEETER
(takes it. looks it over.)
Wow. Thanks Gertrude.

GERTRUDE
Don’t worry about it. Keep it.

BOB
(as Skeeter raises his fists in victory)
On the final pass of the game, Skeeter scores!

Skeeter quickly sits on the note as Teacher passes around the tests. Stacy raises her hand.

TEACHER
Yes? umm-umm, what’s your name?

STACY
Stacy. I found this on the floor.

TEACHER
(looking it over and back to Cory)
Hum. I wonder where this came from.
Good luck everybody.
Everyone starts the test. Teacher continues to watch Skeeter as he tries to look at the cheat sheet without getting caught. She goes over and checks his paper.

TEACHER
Skeeter. I’ll take your cheat sheet now.

SKEETER
Why would you think I’m cheating?

TEACHER
Those are the answers to last week’s test. Stand up.

Skeeter looks at Gertrude. She smiles back as he stands up.

GERTRUDE
Ha! Ha!

Teacher takes the sheet and Skeeter’s test. She slowly tears them both in half.

BOB
Game over! Test one! Skeeter zero!

TEACHER
You get a zero on your test and a
free ticket to the Dean’s office.
(handing him a referral)
I figured I’d catch you cheating,
so I’ve already written up your referral.
Have a nice walk.

OTHER STUDENTS
(under their breath)
Loser.

Skeeter steps out to Down Center as the other students exit with the furniture. The Narrator steps on stage with a broom and starts cleaning up the paper.

BOB
Sure makes a mess when you get caught
cheating. A quick interview with today’s loser.
(holding the broom out like a stand up microphone to Skeeter)
What do you have to say to all your fans?

SKEETER
It’s not my fault I failed this test. I want to thank
my mother and father for putting so much pressure on
me that I had to cheat to try to make them happy.
I want to thank my teacher for doing such a lousy
job teaching me that I had to make up for it by cheating.
I’d like to thank my classmates for not helping me out.
It’s everybody’s fault but mine.

BOB
All done?

SKEETER
That pretty much covers it.

BOB
Now be honest.

SKEETER
I could have aced that test easy.

BOB
Why didn’t you? Is it maybe because you
didn’t care enough, didn’t accept your responsibility
to study, have no respect for school, and you
have such little respect for yourself that you would
rather go around begging cheat sheets than
learning anything, and as a result of your lack of
character, instead of earning an “A”, you not only
are going to get a zero, but you will also be
laughed at during lunch for getting paper pick up and
given the humiliating nickname, “Skeeter the Cheater”?
Does that pretty much, cover it?

Skeeter stares at him for a moment in silence.

SKEETER
You missed a spot.

BOB
(as Skeeter exits)
Thanks Skeeter. See ya at lunch.
We’ll both be cleaning up.
(to audience)
Hey speaking about lunch, let’s move
time up a little bit, and get something to eat.
 

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