I couldn't agree with you more! I also hate to watch TV programs where people talk over each other. Where has civility gone? It is important that we learn to respect those we disagree with. I think people will listen more closely if we do.

While your commentaries talk about respect and fairness, what you are not touching on is trustworthiness, which is at the heart of much of the negative talk that is going on.

While I agree, we should always approach a debate with respect and fairness, how difficult is it to maintain this when every day we are handed another example that the arguments being presented are half-truths to complete falsehoods?

I suggest that you pursue this topic on your next try.

Thank you so much for your commentary this morning. My 4th-grade son experienced a bit of incivility yesterday at school and your commentary reinforced my instruction to him. Rudeness is never acceptable, no matter one's position on an issue. It diminishes one's position and shames your parents. Thank you again.

Go Michael! Too often we forget that our opinion isn't as important as the way we tell our opinion.
When people have the right perspective of themselves, it isn't hard to focus on others.

Mr Josephson, you've made some good sense in what you said. True, it was wrong the way the President was belittled, and this is true for any President of our country. Whether our leaders are right or wrong, we often forget that they are in that position because we put them there. More vital, we are a selfish people and therefore forget what civility and humility are, and compromise is therefore not an option. Yes, this is sad. Would be that we can learn to accept the fact that we all will have differing thoughts, opinions, ideas and political views and by sharing these we can come up with a solution. Unfortunately this mentality of selfishness has penetrated our society from young to old and has hindered more than we will ever know. Just my opinion. Thank you for all your commentaries, even though we don't get to listen to them all. Keep up the good work.

It's sad how few people are interested in reasonable and respectful discourse. I am seriously concerned about the direction of our society when all I hear is name-calling and ridiculing. Thank you for all your commentaries.

Amen, Michael. In responding to your first effort on this front, I entered a copy of something I wrote to a friend when trying to make the distinctions you seemed to be advocating. Ours is not an either/or existence except in very rare and short-lived instances. Civility is contributory to learning, loving, and creating in the vast majority of human interaction. A fellow named Einstein is attributed with having said, "You can live life as if nothing is a miracle; you can live life as if everything is a miracle." It's much more likely the latter can be experienced in an acceptance, promulgation, and defense of civility.

Thank you for your continuing attempts to bring civility into our everyday lives. The media exposes us to so much inappropriate, rude, and hurtful behavior daily that I fear our youth (and their parents) become oblivious of its harmful effects. There have always been and will always be those who try to justify or excuse these behaviors, but I would like to believe, as Anne Frank believed, that the majority of people are still good at heart, in spite of what seem to be the prevailing negative attitudes and behaviors. It was refreshing last week when the man at the baseball game, hugging his daughter who had thrown the baseball back onto the field, got good press and publicity for a civil and beautiful act. We need more everyday examples of good actions and less attention directed at the uncivil ones.

This may be a little off-topic, but it brings up something that has bothered me for some time. It seems like we as a nation have forgotten that the office of President is one that should be honored and respected, even if you do not respect the person in office. It has always bothered me the way that President George W. Bush was mocked and disrespected. Now I have issues with many of his policies and feel he wasn't one of our better presidents, but I don't think he deserved the constant barrage of jokes and disrespectful attitude. I am beginning to see a similar dose of disrespect toward President Obama and it worries me. We have elected these men to lead our nation. It seems like a case of sore losers. Since one party didn't win, they go on the attack and pick at all of the faults of the winner. So much more would get done if we focused on what he was doing well and we all worked together on the issues that we disagree on, instead of constantly attacking each other. I didn't vote for President Obama and I don't agree with a lot of his policies, but I honor and respect him because I am an American and he is the elected leader of my country.

I answered the poll by saying I am more civil than before. Thank you for helping me balance my emotions. I am turning off most of the talk radio (both sides). I found myself getting very angry at the rhetoric from left and right, yet if I can't keep my emotions balanced, I am just as uncivil in my thoughts. I yearn for intelligent, civil dialogue from our elected officials. With your help, maybe it will someday happen. Thank you.

"Passionate political convictions do not yield easily to humility, but without it, respect and compromise are often not options."

1. Please add the word "possibly" before the word "compromise." Compromise of one's beliefs is never required.

2. Not everyone saw/heard the Congressman's inappropriate outburst, but media retorts were more than reports in most instances. Our civility must extend to more than individuals.

I appreciate your articles. Should you not send this commentary to the President? We listen daily to his and his senators speak with disregard to the people who voted him in. Name-calling the people and speaking against Pres. Bush. Going against their views with the healthcare and further issues. Then we turn around and ask ourselves and our children to take the high road with a poor example leading the country.

One of the more troubling aspects of this phenomenon is that when we try to justify our behavior by pointing out (accurately or not) that it's no worse than what the other side has done, we allow them to set the standard, which inevitably declines as each side matches the other in incivility. Bad behavior is bad behavior, even if everyone else engages in it. We should strive to be better, not equally bad.

"Rudeness is a weak person's imitation of strength."

Voltare spoke: "I disagree strongly with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."

That is democracy. Name-calling, half-truths of rhetoric are not part of how Americans should treat each other. Such behavior polarizes us as Americans and weakens our country as a whole.

You're right - and too often I am wrong when it comes to respecting opposing views! Thank you.

I completely agree. While there were criticisms of the former President by his opponents, no member of Congress or Senator ever yelled a rude comment at him while he was speaking.

Many of the opponents of the current President feel they need to take back the country. When presented with the facts of what the current President has done or is proposing, which are hardly radical, these people talk about hidden meanings in legislative wordings and secret societies they just know are directed by the President.

Sadly, it appears that the real reason these people feel the need to take back the country is due to the fact that we now have a non-white President.

Congressman Wilson (R-SC), the one who yelled at the President, is a member of Sons of Confederate Veterans and was part of the group that fought to keep the Confederate flag flying over the state house in South Carolina.

These people can make up all sorts of excuses, but the bottom line is that they see the current President as the bogeyman of their worst nightmare in which white people are no longer the exclusive rulers of this country.

Mr. Josephson, I agree with the spirit of everything you have said. The problem for me, however, arises when my view creates discomfort for my audience. Do I need to water down my position in an effort to be diplomatic? Often that watering down process dilutes and obscures the entire point I'm trying to make. There is a lot to be said for concise, potent rhetoric. Yes, personal attacks should be avoided, but often people perceive they are being attacked when they sense their view is being dismantled. As a lawyer, Mr. Josephson, I suspect you experience this regularly. You are trained to collect facts and harness them together to support your view--and often people become irrationally defensive in response. There's an old saying: "If the truth kills Granny, then let her die." I adhere to this if I believe it is a truth that needs to be uttered. And, unfortunately, we are in a time when there are many, many truths that need to be identified and spoken.

Joe Wilson's "You lie!" to our President was not one of them. Equally shameful was the laughter I heard from people when the news carried the story of President Bush having a shoe thrown at him on a visit to Iraq. These were not necessary truths.

Mr. Josephson, being a writer, I have to first point out that I think you meant to say "The pro-Obamas agreed that INcivility was wrong". Sorry. My husband insists that everyone needs an editor. :) That being said, I write a "Conservative Corner" for a local newspaper and civility was my topic this issue. I am distressed to hear that people responded uncivilly to your commentary, but not surprised. With such blatant examples in the media (Joe Wilson, Serena Williams, Kanye West), we have few role models for maintaining the decorum that would let us all express our opinions in genteel discussion. Keep up the good work!

Exactly. We need to remember that it's perfectly reasonable -- nay, warranted -- to have political disagreements. It's the only way we come to conclusions that will be in the best interests of the country. And remember, when we're discussing how to run the country, we must think country first and ourselves second.

When I witness toxic civility, there seem to be other factors at hand -- quest for power, fear and fear-mongering, and even perceived attacks on belief systems. Political and governmental discussions give way to attacks on belief systems and patriotism.

It boils down to a lack of respect. When we respect others, we do not shout above them. When we respect others, we do not equate verbal disagreements with godlessness. We respect their views, and we work toward agreements we can both live with.

All of us must take a stand against toxic civility. But, alas, until the talk show and reality television producers stop glorifying it for all to witness and emulate, we have no hope. How can we move forward as a country when one of the most popular television shows ("Parental Control") glorifies impropriety and lack of respect between parents and children?

Michael, it's time to establish a national dialogue. How can we help?

Without civility, we as a society are lost. It takes letting go of the anger, pre-concieved notions, and self-rightousness, but are these things I want to hang onto anyway?

I try to approach disagreements with the thought in mind that I may be wrong, and that the person I disagree with has the same good intentions I do. This is obviously not the case in some instances, but at least I can retain my dignity.

Most notable about this commentary was the accompanying poll, in which at present 56% of us hold ourselves in higher regard than others with respect to how civil we are.

If that were true, it seems we wouldn't have so much incivility. Maybe we all need to get the log out of our own eye before trying to pick the speck out of each other's eye.

I have to drive daily in Los Angeles. I wish people would drive with civility. In this day and time, it seems the majority drive in an offensive manner, tail-gating, cutting people off, weaving in and out of traffic, cutting off big rigs (which by the way is very dangerous), driving around traffic on the right shoulder of the road or freeway. This is not only uncivil, but rude as well as dangerous.

Another thought prompted by today's discourse: A saying....
"I treat you as a gentleman, not because you are one but because I am one."

My civility has nothing to do with what others say and do. I am responsible for what I say and how I say it regardless of how others behave or what they say. Having said that, I cannot just let untruths or half-truths go unchallenged, but I should try to do it a respectful manner.

Incivility seems to rule the day because - I believe - it is easier to mouth off than to control the tongue. It is also more rewarding because it gets attention. However, Jesus said to treat others as you want others to treat you. I think that too often we forget that. We just enjoy being rude.

Bravo!!! I personally did not vote for Obama, but I was appalled by those who opposed his efforts to inspire our youth to do well in school. It seems so many just make up their minds before they ever give their opponent a chance. Why can't they see that by clinging to their perceptions of others as opponents they harm our country?

I agree with the poster who pointed out that sometimes incivility is the only choice left when you know that someone with great power is being dishonest. It's called "speaking truth to power." In this case, we have probably the most powerful individual in the world who is stretching the truth while trying to grab even more power from the private sector. And make no mistake, this is a power grab. Once 300 million people become dependent on big government, they become sheep. I'm sorry to have to state the obvious, but dependence is the opposite of independence. It is the opposite of freedom.

I like your commentaries and read them often. Good job. I just wanted to share the following Bible verses in relation to the subject, as I have never found better wisdom in any subject than the one that the Bible has to offer:

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."

"Simply let your yes be Yes and your No no. Anything beyond this comes from the evil one."

"A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man ignores an insult."

"Reckless words pierce like a sword, but a tongue of the wise brings healing."

"He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin."

"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."

"Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing,
because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing."

"If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand."

"If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand."

Yes, character does count. Even if we don't agree with political views of others, keeping our character is most important. Thank you for speaking out for the right thing to do ... even when you may be criticized. Thanks again!