This past two weeks I took a stand and it was for my character, my reputation and credibility as a professional. This was not an easy thing to do as I was up against great odds.

Maybe it has come from reading all of your posts for the last year or so, as in the last sentence I stated, "at the end, all I have left is my character". I believe I surprised quite a few people, especially myself, but I believe it made a number of people think about what one person's unethical behaviour can bring out personal courage, a witness to corporate integrity and personal responsibility. I could have remained quiet and "let things go", but my character was attacked and that was unacceptable and in today's ethical culture, management wants to hide and not "deal". I guess I chose my character was worth more than management being "uncomfortable" with the situation. I believe I rose above it and hopefully I made the right decision. Actually I know I did...My Character is Worth It. Thank you for letting me know Character Counts!

Discouraging bad news is like pretending that throwing away the letter from the IRS means you're not getting an audit or that you haven't put on any weight unless you step on the scale.

"Bad news does not get better with age" - one of my customers, about full and frank disclosure.

I am a middle school principal. I often remind the adolescents sent to the office that making good choices often takes courage, and if they do the right thing, others will notice and will more likely do the right thing when faced with a similar situation. It makes them think.

It is the way we consider someone's attitude unethical is what really matters. Perhaps, according to the other person, you may have provoked it to have led to such behavior. Just remember one thing, Anonymous, that even if the other person's behavior seems unethical to you, just step into his/her shoes and try to imagine what that other person was going through at that time. Try looking at the issue from a different perspective!

I had a recent problem in the workplace and i would appreciate your opinion.

The scenario is as follows:

I work in a photo lab deveolping digital prints, manipulating them and selling digital camaras.

I earn a salary of $2500 per month. i recently went to an interview and felt confident about getting the job.

However, i received a phone from the interview panel informing me that they appointed someone else in the position.

I then tested the waters with my current employer and told him i received a job offer where they would pay me $4000 per month.

To my suprise he equalled their offer. I know my boss and he will not phone the other company to confirm their offer, he will be too happy if i stay.

My moral dilemma is, i am in a postion of trust. i feel i violated that trust.

Now should i accept his offer of paying me $4000 per month or should i tell him the truth?

If i tell him the truth, he might question me as to why i told him of an offer that was not there to begin with....

please help

To Virgil,

It is perhaps better to remain on $2500 since your integrity is at stake here. You actually don't have to tell your boss about it because it will let him lose the trust he may have on you. Sometimes, to keep silent is the best thing one can do. I don't know how you perform your work, but if your boss is happy with your work, then simply leave the solution to your heart because the heart never lies.

I hope this helps!

Virgil,
Since your conscience tells you that you violated your boss's trust, then the only way to remedy it is to tell your boss that you lied and take the consequences. To soften it for yourself is only digging a deeper hole morally. If he questions you as to why you told him of an offer that didn't exist, let him know you compromised your convictions and afterward realized you had done wrong and now want to make it right by telling the truth. He may or may not respect you for that (though I suspect he will), but at least you have done the right thing.

Oh, please. I love what you try to do but your statement, "Although I’m sure the leaders I work with care about ethics and virtue for their own sake," makes me sick. The leaders of these huge companies are not remotely interested in ethics or virtue for their own sake. An employee can follow all the steps in reporting illegal and improper conduct about their supervisors, co-workers or situations and end up losing their homes and livelihood. A sample of what I was told by the head of employee realtions of one of the biggest security companies in the world when numerous complaints had been filed about a project manager and irregularities and the project manager lying to the employee: "Well, if he lied, why don't you just quit?"

When the numerous complaints to another supervisor, a branch manager and the company hotline were brought to the attention of a V.P. and he was asked to gather the information and finally do something about it he said, "I don't feel comfortable telling you whether or not I have that information..."

And your comment today, "Invariably, we discover that at least one in five employees admit they lied to their superior about something significant within the past year and at least one-third concealed or distorted negative information to avoid harmful career repercussions." How about gathering some statistics on how many employers lie to employees and about employees. I had a former employer tell a law enforcement official about how in the interview I'd revealed about my extensive involvement in alcoholics anonymous and narcotics anonymous, two organizations I've never belonged to or said I belonged to. And the interview never happened because the supervisor who was supposed to interview me had something more important to do. He showed up for two minutes in the lobby. One of the reasons I quit right away was because the individual who was training me left work and came back smelling like pot. But the termination documents say they don't know why I quit. I met this man for 90 seconds on my way out the door and he controls the rest of my life because employers are always considered to be the ones telling the truth and that is total garbage.

Do I sound angry. Yes! I work my tail off to do the right thing. You want to teach us so much about honesty and ethics then don't cater to the big wigs who bring you in for these seminars and consultations. How about starting with your law enforcement seminars. I've got nightmares from what I could tell you about that...

I have just had an incident that resulted in my having to resign my job to save a college its integrity. My 9 year old son was abused by 7 members of the college baseball team. When my son came and told me, I went down to the field and used some extremely harsh language (a slip in my character) and told them if they ever touched him again, I would kill them. They went to the coach and told him a lie, that they did nothing and that my 9 year old was wrong. But I, along with my wife and other son, saw the welps and the marks of where they hit him.

To make a long story short, the Vice President called me in and started addressing me about what I had said to them. The students had failed to comment about the reason I did it. They all 7 lied and failed to mention the abuse. I told the Vice President that there would be no problems since I planned to resign and take my child away from that atmosphere.

News of the incident, and the lies told, have gone all over the state and people are calling me to offer jobs and to tell me their stories about these same baseball members habits of drugs, drinking and general abuse of others.
I feel I am deserting a cause by not going public and getting these characterless guys off the college team, but as a human I hate to destroy the lives of others. And the college is being so careful to protect their image.

Am I wrong to just move on and let the incident go? I will see that my son gets the help he might need to recover and to understand that what they did was wrong.