But I Really Need It! 553.2
A sure way to evoke angry mail is to criticize common rationalizations. So I expected to be called a self-righteous purist who is out of touch with reality when I protested against a young man’s decision to conceal from a new employer his commitment to start his Air Force tour of duty in three months.
It’s hard to face the fact that just because we’re convinced we have a moral right to something doesn’t mean others have a moral obligation to give it to us. The filter of self-interest inevitably distorts our perceptions about our rights and others’ obligations.
It’s even harder to accept that wanting something, even needing it, is not a moral justification for lying, cheating, or stealing to get it. Moreover, most necessity claims are illusions. As Nietzsche said, "Necessity is not a fact; it’s an interpretation."
When our children solemnly declare, "But I really need it!" or "That’s so unfair!" we don’t take their claims at face value. We’ve got to be equally critical of our own rationalizations.
Remember, if it’s okay for someone who needs a short-term job to lie or conceal important facts to get it, it’s equally okay for an employer who needs a short-term employee to lie. If it’s okay for a tenant who needs an apartment to lie about having pets, then we can’t complain if the landlord falsely promises to install a new carpet.
Next time you feel justified in lying to get what you deserve, ask yourself if you’d feel the same way if you were the one being lied to.
This is Michael Josephson reminding you that character counts.
Comments
Well said, Mr. Josephson. I will remember this one for a long long time!
Posted by: Arum | February 11, 2008 8:01 PM
Wow Michael!
This commentary touched a raw nerve for me. I'm a regular listener on drive time here in LA and when I heard this I felt it was me.
I have struggled on this for a long time. I am a person that made a mistake - I was convicted of a felony. On employment applications i have lied..rationalized my decision. I struggle with this, and your commentary made me reflect on my choice and decision.
Does the fact that I plead into our legal system which requires you to have money to defend yourself justify it? I think not. If I had Michael Jackson's money, could i defend myself and be ok with what I filled on an application? No.
I don't have the answer but I thank you for raising the issue again, and I will continue to struggle with it, balancing my support for my kids and my desire to live in a life where I can feel good about my choices.
Regards,
Mitch from Los Angeles
Posted by: Mitchell S | February 11, 2008 9:54 PM
I am very glad that you brought this up. I think too often we only see things from our own perspective and forget to look at it from the opposing viewpoint. It's not really fair for an employer to spend their time and money training an employee who is knowingly leaving in a short time. Just because the man in your article was doing something honorable doesn't justify his dishonorable actions by lying to the potential employer (choosing not reveal the truth is lying).
Posted by: Amanda | February 14, 2008 2:52 PM
What an inspiring piece! I second what Arum wrote. Thanks Michael!
Posted by: Susana | February 15, 2008 6:48 AM
micheal
What about lying to save your life, maybe attacked by armed robbers? Is that moral?
Posted by: adedoyin kehinde-awoyele | February 16, 2008 7:32 AM
Thanks for your piece and for Mitch's response. Taking a larger view, the discussion has value. As people struggle with what to say or to not say and if they can justify not speaking the truth, we all ask tougher broader questions. And in doing so, most people strive to do the right thing at least for moments. In Mitch's case, watching the struggle will perhaps motivate others to avoid actions that result in felonies. And in that, we all learn, as you say clearly and consistently that "Character counts".
Posted by: Dave Quigley | February 19, 2008 8:23 AM
Just noticed this. I remember sending in this question to Michael a few years ago concerning my son-in-law and daughter. I agreed with Michael at the time and provided them that advice. He told the employer, who promptly fired him on the spot. Lesson: they certainly didn't starve to death but I don't think he would do it again, given the same situation.
Posted by: Hughey | February 19, 2008 1:02 PM
Hughey wrote that a son-in-law faced this issue. The result of his decision to be honest and reveal the truth was the loss of his job. "... given the same situation" he would probably NOT do it again. It's unfortunate that paying the price for his honesty yielded negative results, but having character means doing what's right, even when the cost is high, even when it hurts.
Posted by: Jim | February 21, 2008 4:10 PM
Think about it. If he hadn't been fired, he wouldn't have been forced to face the reality. The boss did him a favor. He was given the opportunity to prove to himself that it wasn't "the end of the world". The consequence was tough, but he got through it! Im sure he's a better person for it.
Posted by: Will | February 22, 2008 1:17 PM